Humour Quotes

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• Manners come down to a single principle, talk of nothing that might actually prove interesting.

  Meredith Duran

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• Pretend to be mad and talk a lot. Then — and this is the important bit — do nothing at all until you absolutely have to and then make sure everyone dies.

  Jasper Fforde

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• These things sneak up on him for no reason, these flashes of irrational happiness. It’s probably a vitamin deficiency.

  Margaret Atwood

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• All I know about humour is that I don’t know anything about it.

  Fred Allen

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• If you were going to be successful in the world of crime, you needed a reputation for honesty.

  Terry Pratchett

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• Dream is not what we see in sleep. Dream is that which doesn’t allow us to sleep…

  Sandeep Yadav

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• Network administrators all share an abiding and passionate desire for one thing: We want our users to shut up.

  Michael W. Lucas

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• After Puckoon I swore I’d never write another book. This is it.

  Spike Milligan

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• Philosophy is not suited for the masses, what they need is holiness.

  Friedrich Nietzsche

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• I don’t think I’d want Mickey Mouse pimping for me anyway.

  Haruki Murakami

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• But the purpose of the book is not the horror, it is horror’s defeat.

  Terry Pratchett

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• I’m not saying he was, like, crying tears of man pain over the phone, but he sounded upset.

  Hannah Harrington

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• Normal is just a setting on your dryer.

  Patsy Clairmont

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• Why save the rainforest, the whales, or the world when you can devote your time to saving syllables?

  Lindsay Faith Rech

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• The problem with political jokes is they get elected.

  Henry Cate VII

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• Discipline to be effective must be optional.

  Hector Hugh Munro

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• Humour is meant, in a literal sense, to make game of man; that is, to dethrone him from his official dignity and hunt him like game.

  G. K. Chesterton

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• Pumpkins are the only living organisms with triangle eyes.

  Harland Williams

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• leave not a speck. That may cause a wreck…

  Tushar Raheja

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• Having one eye makes you see the world in unusual ways, Shockwave…

  Nick Roche

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