Rita Rudner Quotes

• I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don’t know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I’ll break up with someone on purpose.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Love

  Tags in Purpose, Relationship

• I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Life, Love

  Tags in Great, Person

• I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Children

  Tags in Young, Want, Parents

• I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn’t mine.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Kicked

• I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Meet, Gracefully, Until

• Before I met my husband, I’d never fallen in love. I’d stepped in it a few times.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Love

  Tags in Times

• A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won’t get a bikini wax.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Country

  Tags in War, Man

• My husband gave me a necklace. It’s fake. I requested fake. Maybe I’m paranoid, but in this day and age, I don’t want something around my neck that’s worth more than my head.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Age

• I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Poodles, Members, Cult, Religious, Wonder, Other, Think, Weird

• In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Success

  Tags in Hollywood, Outlasts, Marriage, Milk

Rita Rudner (50)

Birth:	17th September, 1953
Nationality:	American
Profession:	Actress, Comedian, Writer

About

Rudner was born in Miami, Florida, the daughter of Frances, a homemaker, and Abe Rudner, a lawyer. Her mother died when she was 13. After graduating from high school at 15, Rudner left Miami and headed to New York City to embark on a career as a dancer.

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Today's Anniversary - 9th January

Births

• 1890 - Karel Capek
• 1939 - Susannah York
• 1932 - Robert Patrick Casey Sr.
• 1902 - Rudolf Bing
• 1890 - Kurt Tucholsky

Deaths

• 1996 - Walter Miller
• 1886 - Aaron Anderson
• 1908 - Wilhelm Busch
• 2003 - Will McDonough
• 1324 - Marco Polo